"This could have been a disaster," quipped the purple coiffed Kelly in the return of Fashion Police on E! Entertainment (DStv 124) following the sudden-shocking death of Joan Rivers in 2014, commenting on a 2015 Golden Globe actress' wearables.
Instead of "could have been" she should have used the word "is".
The "new" Fashion Police on E! Entertainment is a television disaster just like SABC1's "new" Generations - The Legacy.
Kathy Griffin replacing Joan Rivers and Brad Goreski (who likes to tell us he is gay) in the place of the dumped George Kotsiopoulos is now soulless TV trash, trying to emulate the spirit of something it can't, and pretending to be something it no longer is.
The production values visibly took a nosedive - why E! Entertainment and the producers felt the need to change the opening title graphics and package of Fashion Police from the vibey, colourful and pumping opener to a shockingly dated 80s CNN Style with Elsa Klench mix-up is anyone's guess.
It looks old. It looks tired. It looks dark. Everything the fashion world, which Fashion Police purportedly tries to comment on, abhors.
The new Fashion Police set: Green and black and dark - as if Melissa Rivers or someone who should know better, forgot to cover up some actual studio green screen.
The seating arrangements started off wrong. Giuliana Rancic and Kelly Osbourne who are still on the show no longer sat together for the new Fashion Police debut. That dynamic brought laughs previously as they used to lunge, grab and hold on to each other during certain really crazy jokes.
Now they worked together, subtly, to undermine Kathy Griffin from opposite sides and their common target and "enemy" Kathy Griffin in the middle. Why Brad Goreski (who likes to tell us he is gay) is on the show is anyone's guess. Tell Gargamel there's an obnoxious Smurf he never knew about.
By the second episode Fashion Police thankfully placed Giuliana Rancic and Kelly Osbourne next to each other again on the left side (although they've now switched seats; Giuliana is closer to the middle to anchor the show). One production point to the better for Griffin-dor!
Viewers can feel the subtle disses towards Kathy Griffin on the new Fashion Police after just two episodes.
You realise that you're no longer watching four friends chatting and joking and having fun. You're watching two friends (Giuliana Rancic and Kelly Osbourne), a stylist (who likes to tell us he is gay over and over) and comedian Kathy Griffin who is stilted and short on actual funny jokes and keeps repeating the same hammed lines.
It's not that viewers don't like change and won't accept the new Fashion Police. It's that the new Fashion Police is worse production wise that the original.
It's a given that Kathy Griffin would have been very nervous stepping into Joan Rivers' chair. But didn't they do a dry-run? And why is everything and everyone still so awkward after the second episode of Fashion Police?
Giuliana Rancic has taken over as unofficial master of ceremonies (she even says "ladies and gentlemen"),making it even more awkward, in addition to Kathy Griffin no longer being the final arbiter of best and worse dressed.
It's awkward having to listen to Kathy Griffin just going with a denounced "okay", "okay" after the rest of the trio have chimed in with their opinions - emotionally and visibly seceding in perceived "power" from the dominant role Joan Rivers held.
Yes. Kathy Griffin is not Joan Rivers. And isn't trying to be.
But then E! Entertainment should perhaps not have continued Fashion Police after her death.
The "new" Fashion Police is not fun and not funny. It's not fun to watch. It's not insightful.
The foursome now try to do filthy jokes but without proper context and which isn't about the actual outfits and clothes and how it looks on the stars like during the tenure of Joan Rivers - which in itself makes the jokes and them, and watching them, feel even more awkward.
Kathy Griffin is not in control of the show. Neither is Giuliana Rancic who tries to either "help" or "undermine" or "step in and save" - none of which is effectively working and all of which is making it worse. It makes the "new" Fashion Police strange and uncomfortable to watch.
Fashion Police on E! Entertainment used to be like fresh champagne while Joan Rivers was still alive. It was effervescent pop culture - with spot-on zingers and timeous, relevant commentary.
Now like a glamorous party where the waiters carry around champagne on silver trays - still in flute glasses but the drinks now devoid of bubbles after its been poured and left standing for too long - Fashion Police is still there but not sparkling.
Perhaps the time has come for Fashion Police to gracefully call it a night, and for E! Entertainment as the host to open a brand new bottle.
